


On the Wind

by TheTacticianAlchemist



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, F/M, Felicia-centric, Fire Emblem Fates: Birthright Spoilers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-28
Updated: 2016-04-28
Packaged: 2018-06-05 00:25:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6682051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTacticianAlchemist/pseuds/TheTacticianAlchemist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The breeze took the sheet she had been trying to put on the laundry line. It flew through the air, fluttering and twisting, always just out of her reach.</p>
<p>He hadn’t caught it so much as the wind seemed to place it within his grasp. </p>
<p>[Felicia x Kaze]</p>
            </blockquote>





	On the Wind

**Author's Note:**

> the first time I played Hoshido (technically, Byakuya), it took me so long because I could barely read it. (good practice, right?) so, I married Kaze and Felicia, and goddamn, they were the best in my game. 
> 
> this is obviously embellished for the sake of fic, but everything in here happened in my first playthrough of the game ever, and this is why Felicia is one of my favorites (and why I can't seriously ship her with anyone but Kaze).
> 
> (I usually write in present tense, in case there are mistakes I don't catch.)

The breeze took the sheet she had been trying to put on the laundry line. It flew through the air, fluttering and twisting, always just out of her reach. 

He hadn’t caught it so much as the wind seemed to place it within his grasp. He held it firmly, as if the suddenly gentle air might try to snatch it from him.

“Felicia-san,” he said, using one of those Hoshidan honorifics that she still had little understanding of aside from it being polite. “Are you the owner of this sheet?”

“Kaze!” She skid to a stop, nearly falling flat onto her face. She gasped for breath, but smiled at him all the same. “You caught it for me! Thank you so much!”

He nodded, smiling in turn, but it was much smaller and softer than hers. “No need for thanks. I’m just glad I could be of service.”

“But I  _ should _ thank you,” she insisted, taking the sheet from him. “You really helped me out there. Thanks to you, I might even finish all my chores today without a single mistake.”

He paused. His face twitched like he was holding back a grimace. “Is...that rare?”

Felicia could feel her face heat. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything,” she mumbled. More loudly, she continued, “Yes, it is. I’m not a very good maid…. I try not to be a burden, but, I, um, make a lot of mistakes.”

“I see. Well if that’s the case, allow me to assist you now and then.”

Despite her protests, Kaze just shrugged them off and gave her a gentle smile. He helped her put up the rest of the laundry, his greater height and deft fingers making the work quick and simple. Felicia caught herself staring at him, wishing she were a natural like him and Flora. 

In the midst of her thoughts, she dropped another sheet, and Kaze retrieved it from the air almost before she could even blink.

* * *

 

He was too busy on some days for her to even catch sight of him. She found herself thinking of him and Flora often--even Jakob. She hadn’t seen her sister and the butler since leaving Nohr, and she missed not only their help, but their scolding as well. Everyone pulled their own weight in the army, but she messed up so often she felt as if she was just making more work for everyone.

But on some days when she worked alone, she found herself without any mistakes. On cooking duty, she turned the oven off before the meal could catch fire; when she was helping touch up one of the shops, the paint she thought she’d brought turned out to be different (and the color she actually needed); and when retrieving laundry from the line, it seemed as if the clothes were already freshly pressed.

One morning, Kaze joined her for an excursion out of the astral plane to shop in a local market. She had waited for him in front of the gate, and he had been just a minute late--holding Felicia’s forgotten grocery list.

The market was crowded. Felicia bumped into several stalls, but Kaze caught any fruit that started to tumble toward the ground. She counted the payment wrong, but he added the precise amount of coins needed without taking more than a few seconds to count them. 

When they were finished, they started walking back through the market toward where they had left the astral plane. Kaze carried more than his fair share of supplies, and Felicia walked beside him, staring absently ahead of them.

“It seems we’ve gotten all the items on our list,” Kaze remarked, folding up the bit of paper in his fingers.

Felicia only mumbled a distracted response.

“Hm?” He looked toward her. “Did we forget to buy something?”

She jumped, nearly falling backward--and even laden down with groceries, Kaze deftly reached a hand toward the small of her back and kept her upward. Her body flushed with heat at the contact, but a moment later, his hand was gone.

“No, no,” she said, regaining her composure. “I’m just surprised at how smoothly our shopping trip went.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?” Kaze asked with a frown on his face. “It means you did well, Felicia-san.”

“No… I”m pretty sure it’s just because you were here with me. And if you weren’t here, I wouldn’t have had the shopping list.”

He must have seen how truly dejected and disappointed she was in herself, because he spoke quickly, but also with a reassurance she could nearly feel. “Yes, well, we all lose things now and then. In any event, don’t feel like you owe me anything. I told you I would assist you…which is why I’ve been checking in on you regularly to make sure everything is okay,” he admitted.

“W-what?! You have?” At his nod, Felicia felt her face heat again. “T-that must be why I haven't been messing up lately,” she muttered, looking away. She turned back to him and smiled, thinking of how much like Flora and Jakob he was even without meeting them. Even knowing that her successes weren’t actually her own, her heart felt lighter at the thought of Kaze going out of his way to help her, like they were friends. “Thank you, Kaze. I am in your debt.”

He smiled in return. “Not at all. I am helping you because I want to. Well, that and--” He coughs. “Never mind.”

“Huh?” Felicia tipped her head, unsure whether or not she heard him. “That and what?”

“Nothing, just a slip of the tongue.” He looked forward. “Forgive me.”

“Hey!” Felicia pouted. “You’re hiding something from me, aren’t you?!”

“Of course not,” he lied smoothly. “I am just happy to be of service. Is that not enough?”

She shook her head vehemently and came closer to him. “You can’t fool me!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about. Good day,” he said, and with his ninja-borne speed, he left ahead of her almost faster than her eyes could follow.

“Hey! You can’t just run away like that!” Felicia called, following at a run herself. “Kaze!”

* * *

 

Kaze didn’t join her in her chores for the next several days. She would find some of the shops already swept, or a tent patched up, but the only time she saw Kaze was when they were marching or when he was doing other errands around the astral plane. She caught sight of him and Corrin outside of Lilith’s temple, seemingly in deep conversation. She nearly dropped her basket of fruit when she lifted up her hand to wave; neither man saw her, and she almost didn’t catch the grimace on Kaze’s face when he turned and disappeared, leaving Corrin frowning.

* * *

 

The sound of humming wafted from the mess hall. Felicia wandered inside, listening intently. Azura was at the counter, putting rice balls and sandwiches into two picnic baskets.

“Oh, Felicia.” The songstress stopped her humming and looked up when she noticed the maid. “What are you doing here?”

“I heard you singing,” Felicia answered. “And I thought I might try to make something.”

A glimmer of fear shone in Azura’s eyes, but it was gone quickly, and Felicia wondered if perhaps it had just been a trick of the light. “Well, I’m glad if you enjoyed my voice.”

Felicia nodded and looked toward the baskets. “Are you going somewhere today?”

“Corrin and I are going to visit Kana and Shigure,” she replied, putting the last rice ball into the basket. “It’s only been a few days for us, but I wonder how much they’ve grown….”

“Well, have a good time,” Felicia wished, bowing as Azura gathered up the baskets and left. Alone now, the maid hummed a little of Azura’s song and went behind the counter, taking out the materials and ingredients needed to make soup.

“Alright,” she murmured a little while later, opening a jar. “Now for a pinch of salt….”

“...That is the sugar.”

Felicia jumped, throwing the jar into the air. “K-Kaze!”

The ninja caught the jar in one hand and the lid in the other. “Hello, Felicia,” he said, putting the cover on and placing the jar back on the counter. “Always remember to double-check your seasonings.”

“Y-yes, of course,” she said, regaining her breath. When his words really registered with her--though she failed to realize he didn't use any Hoshidan honorific with her name--she laughed. “I’ll do that, Kaze.”

He paused--she could swear his cheeks were pink--and a smile wider than any she’d seen from him bloomed on his face. “Good.”

“Um…” She fiddled with the spoon in the pot, stirring the soup--then remembered her original goal and hurried to add in salt. While working, as to try not to seem too obvious, she asked, “While you’re here… The other day, you were just about to tell me why you were helping me, but stopped. What were you going to say?”

“Ah.” He grimaced. “You remember that.”

“Of course I do! I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it!” She dropped the wooden spoon onto the floor in her excitement, then reached to grab a dishrag to wipe up the small mess. “See? It’s been causing me to mess up my chores more than usual,” she sighed, finishing up the cleaning and putting the dirty materials in the sink.

Kaze put a hand to his chin. “Even more? That is a problem…. Very well, but I want you to promise me something. You must never tell Corrin-sama what I am about to disclose to you.”

“Lord Corrin?” Felicia paused to think, wondering if Kaze’s reasoning was serious enough to warrant her talking to her master about it. Finally, she said: “Okay. I promise.”

Kaze nodded. “The truth is...Corrin-sama asked me to look after you.”

It took a moment for the words to sink in.

“W-what?” An overwhelming sense of shame hung over her, making her flustered and wishing she could hide behind Flora like she did as a child. “D-does Lord Corrin not trust me to do my work?”

“I wouldn’t put it like that.” He put his hand on Felicia’s arm, rooting her to the spot and keeping her mind grounded. “Corrin-sama cherishes you. I think that’s why he came to talk to me. He just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

The thought warmed her heart, and Felicia wiped at her eye. “I guess you’re right. It’s just… I only wanted to be helpful, but it turns out I’m just a burden on the both of you…”

“No,” Kaze said firmly, his eyes narrowing slightly. “You’re a valuable part of the army, Felicia. You’re adept with daggers on the battlefield, for one; and you work your hardest. You shouldn’t feel like a burden when you’re helped…. That’s what friends are for. So, please, don’t beat yourself up too much over it.”

A smile broke out on her lips. “O-okay. Okay. Thank you, Kaze. You always know what to say, don’t you?”

He watched her intently, and his reply was a heartbeat late. “It’s not a problem, Felicia.”

“So…” Her eyes wandered before snapping back to his. “Does this mean we’re friends? You’re not just helping because you have to?”

“Of course,” he insisted. His grip on her arm tightened, and Felicia belatedly realized that he had yet to move it. “I said so from the beginning. I enjoy helping you.”

Her smile widened to a grin. “That’s great! I’m so glad to have you as a friend.”

“Likewise,” he replied, his nod stiff but a slight flush rising to his cheeks again. She was about to ask if he was okay, but he looked toward the stove. “Perhaps you should check the soup before you burn it.”

“Ah! You’re right!”

* * *

 

Kaze started to join her more often in her chores. They exchanged all sorts of words--sometimes idle chatter, sometimes the differences in their cultures, and other times they spoke of their training and childhoods. Kaze spoke very little about his ninja training, apologizing for the secrecy, but Felicia didn’t blame him one bit. Upon discovering the fact that they were both fraternal twins, they laughed and shared stories from days long gone, and were quieter about days more recent.

“I miss Flora terribly,” Felicia admitted one day as they hung the laundry. “But lately, it’s been easier.”

“Oh?” Kaze took a clothespin from her and pinched a shirt to the line. “Why do you think so?”

Her eyes averted toward the ground. “I have more friends around me now to help me. Like you.”

He chuckled. “Well, I’m glad you appear to appreciate me.”

They moved further down the clothesline, and Felicia handed him a pair of pants to put up. She hesitated while he worked, then said, “Kaze…”

“Yes? What is it?”

The way he looked at her--stopping his actions, giving her all of his attention--made her heart beat fast. She felt her cheeks heat, but she didn’t want to look away from him. “Y-you… You’re a good friend and person. I’m really thankful to have someone like you.”

His face fell, and he looked away. “I...am flattered. But I am not a good person.”

She blinked, not registering his words for a few seconds. “What? What do you mean?”

Kaze shook his head and finished putting the pants onto the clothesline. “It is something I prefer not to talk about,” he said, grabbing a sheet from the laundry basket and a handful of clothespins. 

Her brows knitted together, and her lips fell into a frown. All of his attention seemed to be put into the simple task of putting up the laundry, as if it were difficult, critical.

“You can tell me about it, you know,” she said quietly. “About anything.”

He slowly put the last clothespin in place and turned his head to her. “Felicia?”

“I-I mean, it’s the least I can do,” she babbled, flustered. “I-I’m always happy for your help, a-and lately you’ve been dropping by more often. Sometimes you show up when I’m not having any trouble at all!”

His lips parted open. “Do I?”

“You do! T-that’s part of why I think you’re such a good person." She blushed fully now, her eyes darting from his face, to the basket in her hands, and back again. “But are you just trying to be prepared for when I do make a mistake? Because you don’t have to! There are whole days I don’t make any mistakes at all!”

Kaze hesitated, then moved closer to her. “No,” he said slowly, quietly. “You’ve got the wrong idea.”

Felicia stared up at him. “Then what is it?”

Kaze leaned down toward her, over the laundry basket, and softly pressed his lips against hers.

A breeze blew through the astral plane, stirring their hair and the laundry around them. His lips were cool and gentle like the air. 

He pulled away just a few inches, his cheeks red and his eyes searching her face. She was warm from head to toe, her mouth tingling like he was still kissing her.

Felicia’s eyes widened, and the basket slipped from her hands.

“Ow!” Kaze hissed. He yanked his foot from underneath the basket and jerking his leg up to hold his injury.

“K-Kaze! I’m so sorry!” Felicia put a hand over her mouth, horrified, and reached out to help try to steady him with the other. His blush flared up again, and she slipped as she leaned forward--and they tumbled onto the grass.

“Oh, gods,” she moaned into the dirt. She rose to her hands and knees, pouting as she looked at Kaze sprawled on his back. “Are you okay?”

He winced, then sat up. His hair was disheveled, his clothes covered with bits of grass and flakes of dirt. He patted his foot, nodding to himself--and then he looked at Felicia, and laughed.

She blinked, then frowned. “H-hey! What’s that for? Am I all dirty now?” she asked, sitting back and brushing the front of her uniform.

Kaze’s laughter subsided into a chuckle, and he smiled at her. “Well, that, and… I like being around you.” 

She stared at him. “...Huh?”

“Before… I only wanted to help you, as an ally and a friend. But I’ve come to realize that now I just want to spend time with you.” He paused, as if he were almost as flustered as she was. “But I’ve come to realize that now I just want to spend time with you. I want to hear you laugh, and talk with you, and learn more about you… I love you, Felicia.”

“You…” Her mouth dropped open. “You  _ what _ me?!”

He reached forward and took her hand. “Felicia… You’re an honest person. You act always with earnestness and sincerity, and you are kind. You don’t resent having devoted your life to serving others like other servants do. And as I’ve grown close to you, and come to see who you really are… I’ve fallen in love with you.” His grip tightened slightly, and he leaned forward. “Will you be with me?”

Her mouth opened and closed a few times, and she ran her hand over her face. “I-I’m sorry, I’m just--I didn’t think you would ever feel the same…”

“You mean…?”

She smiled at him, meeting his wide eyes. “...Yes, Kaze. I am yours. I have been yours for a while now.”

He grinned, an expression she wasn’t expecting from him, and he kissed her again, this time more firmly, with his hand stroking her cheek. She closed her eyes, taking in the sensations, mesmerized by them.

“I have not felt such joy in a long time,” he murmured, resting his head against hers. “Thank you, my love. I will protect you always.”

She giggled. “And I’ll do the same.”

“By throwing laundry baskets at the enemy?” He squeezed her hand.

“Hey! …If that’s what it takes.”

* * *

 

Neither wanted their wedding to be a big event, but Corrin and Azura took the reins and planned a daylong feast. 

The ceremony was Hoshidan-style: Oboro made Kaze a black  _ haori _ and Felicia a white  _ shiromuku _ kimono, and Azama presided over the ritual prayer to the gods and the exchange of sake between the bride and groom. Felicia was glad this part of the wedding was more private, restricted to a priest, the bride and groom, and their close family members. Saizo represented Kaze’s family, and Corrin and Azura stood in place of Felicia’s father and sister.

The reception was loud and boisterous, sake and food passed along everywhere. Felicia herself wasn’t used to drinking, and if it weren’t for Kaze’s careful watch on her, she would have made it far past tipsy. 

Kaze’s quarters became their shared home. He helped her out of her kimono, and she sniffed the whole time about wishing her family were there. He kissed the tears from her cheeks, and she pulled him close.

* * *

 

“Kaze?” she murmured, when the morning light woke her. She moved her hand from his chest to his cheek. “You remember that you can tell me anything, right?”

He smiled softly, but the expression didn’t meet his eyes. He took his hand from her waist and entwined their fingers together. “I do. But that matter… I am not ready.”

“All right. I can wait for you to be ready.”

He kissed her wrist. “My love…” he whispered, closing his eyes. “How did I ever deserve you?”

* * *

 

The wind howled.

Felicia cried long past the point of exhaustion. She was aware of someone helping her up and urging her along, because they still had to make headway in case there were more wolfskin, or another landslide. 

They made it to the peak of Mr. Garou just as the sun rose over the horizon. The air had calmed somewhat, and the breeze ruffled her clothes and her hair.

“Kaze,” she choked out, and she looked not at the sun nor the mountains around them, but at the edge of Mt. Garou.

For a moment--just a moment--she thought of life her life without Jakob and Flora, and of her life now without Kaze, and she lifted her foot to start walking toward that precipice. 

Without warning, the wind blew harder, holding her back in what felt like an embrace.

* * *

 

When Jakob found them, his clothes were a wreck. Felicia cried and hugged him, much to his disgust, and set out at once to help him acclimate to life in the astral plane. She gave him her old quarters and extra clothes, showed him the various shops, and where she kept Corrin’s special tea set.

“All right, all right,” he said, clearly fed up with her constant presence. He mumbled through a mental checklist, keeping count on his fingers. Finally, he asked, “And where is the laundry done?”

Without even a heartbeat to think, she said, “I do all the laundry.”

* * *

 

“Lady Azura?”

The songstress looked up from her inventory checklist of the staff store. She smiled, but not like the others did toward her now--she didn’t smile with sad eyes. “What is it, Felicia?”

The maid could feel her eyes becoming wet. “How long did it take you to notice you were with child?”

“Ah.” She puts her finger to her chin. “With Shigure, I was late only two weeks afterward… With Kana, it was nearly a full four.” She paused. “May I ask?”

Felicia sat on the stool beside Azura. She put her hand on her stomach, hoping for a blessing. “I have only a few days left.”

Azura put a hand on her back. 

“Do you know any Hoshidan names?” Felicia asked a few minutes later.

The smile came back to the songstress’s face. “Of course. Do you want a specific meaning?”

“If the baby is a boy, I'll name him Suzukaze. But I don’t know any girls’ names…” She closed her eyes. A smile broke out on her lips. “Is there any name that means  _ green _ ?”

* * *

 

The snowy wind was home to her.

Flora was rather stiff as she led the way to the Ice Tribe, but she had always had a weakness for her sister. She softened up, if only slightly, listening to Felicia’s tales. When Felicia spoke of Kaze’s passing, Flora gripped her hand.

“I wish I had been able to meet him,” she said. “I should have been at your wedding, even if… Never you mind. But will you tell me more about him?”

The ache in Felicia’s heart would never go away, but when she spoke of her late husband with her sister, the tears crystallizing on her cheeks were as much from joy as they were from pain.

* * *

 

“Flora,” she said, taking her twin’s hands. “You can’t trust what King Garon said.”

The blue-haired maid closed her eyes. “I know...but it was that or risk certain destruction. He gave me thirty seconds to make a decision before killing me on the spot. Being weak and afraid of death, I shamefully decided to betray you.”

“None of this is your fault, Flora,” Corrin said, coming closer. “I just wish you’d trusted that we could help you.”

“No.” Flora let go of Felicia’s hands and took a step backward. She looked straight into Corrin’s eyes. “Nothing will change the fact that I betrayed you.” She looked sadly to Felicia. “Not to mention my own flesh and blood.”

“Flora--” Felicia began, but Flora shook her head.

“For that,” she said, “I deserve to die.”

* * *

 

The icy wind Felicia called forth wasn’t enough.

She sank to her knees in the snow, watching as a serene smile fell upon Flora’s lips: “I regret everything.”

And then, her body collapsed, slowly crumbling into ash to be blown away in the wind.

* * *

* * *

* * *

 

Felicia took the laundry down from the line, folding and putting the items into the basket. Her body ached, and there were bandages in places all over her body, but nothing could stop chores from having to be done, even the end of the war. Especially the end of the war.

With peace returned to the land, her comrades ventured to the deep realms to bring their children to the astral plane in preparation for the return to Hoshidan land. Ryoma stood with his wife, somehow stern and flustered at the same time as he tried to explain Shiro’s lineage to the boy. Takumi walked toward the archery range and ruffled Kiragi’s hair. Caeldori was following her father around while Hisame was trying to avoid his.

Felicia smiled, if at least a bit wistfully.

Corrin and his children came from the gate. Kana clutched his hand, and Shigure tightly gripped his mother’s blessed lance.

Felicia watched as they took in the sight before them. Corrin looked around slowly, then finally met Felicia’s gaze. He spoke quietly to Kana and Shigure, pointing them toward his private quarters, and then walked over toward one of his oldest friends.

She put away the shirt she had just folded and turned to meet him. “What is it, Lord Corrin?”

When Kaze had died, he had looked at her with pity and guilt. Now, his crimson eyes held nothing but a sad understanding.

“I realized that I never told you Kaze’s last words.”

It felt as if something were squeezing her heart. “What were they?”

“He said that his death was an atonement.” Corrin’s eyes watered, and Felicia realized that this was the first time he was speaking of this. “That when he was a child, he saw Nohrians entering Cheve, but didn’t understand what was happening. That was when I was kidnapped.”

Felicia closed her eyes. “He blamed himself for you, and for how your birth family suffered?”

Corrin nodded. “He never forgave himself.”

“I wish he had told me,” she murmured. “I always told him he could tell me anything.”

“I--” Corrin choked on his words and put his hand over his face. “I told Azura the same thing, time and time again.”

Tears fell from Felicia’s eyes, and she embraced him.

"Even if it were Kaze's fault," she said quietly as he cried into her shoulder. "Even if it were... He brought you back here to your family. He made you happy, and me, too."

* * *

 

“The laundry can’t wait forever,” she said to herself, almost singing. She reached up on her toes and plucked the clothespins from the line. 

A sudden breeze blew through the astral plane and tore the sheet from her hand. It flew through the air, twisting and fluttering.

She ran after it.


End file.
